Lycoris, the fair Gaul, was giving a splendid entertainment. Valerius Martialis, the greatest wit of the city of the Seven Hills, had recited his newest and most poignant epigrams with loud applause, and the company--more than a hundred persons--were reclining at supper on cushioned divans in the lavishly-decorated eating-room. The young Massilian lady presided. With her neck and shoulders half-veiled in transparent gauze from Cos, her magnificent golden-yellow hair knotted up at the back of her head and wreathed simply with ivy, she smiled radiantly from the head of the table, the object of silent worship to many, and of eager admiration to all. A number of slaves, in handsome Alexandrian dresses, moved quickly and silently about the handsome hall, while across the supper table the conversation each instant grew more lively.
Among the guests was Caius Aurelius, the young Batavian. He had yielded to the pressure of curiosity or of fashion--particularly when the name of the famous epigrammatist had weighed down the scale.
“Really,” he was saying to his neighbor Norbanus--the commandant of the Praetorian guard--“really, Norbanus, till this hour I had esteemed myself rich, but here I feel by comparison a beggar. What splendor, what lavish outlay! Pillars of alabaster, enormous gold plates, carpets worth an estate--my senses reel. Everything which elsewhere would appear rare and choice is here in every day use. By Hermes! but the father of Lycoris must have been a favorite of fortune.”
“Not so loud!” interrupted Lucius Norbanus. “See, Stephanus is looking this way with a meaning glance.”
“Stephanus! The Empress’s steward? What has he to do with Lycoris?”
“Ha! well, I will tell you that another time,” said the officer filling his mouth with a fine oyster, “between ourselves, you know. Meanwhile, I strongly advise you to taste those delicious mollusks. If you are like me, laughing has made you ferociously hungry.”
“You certainly laughed most heartily,” replied Aurelius accepting some of the praised dish from a slave; “but I, for my part, cannot get up any taste for this kind of verse. Martial is full of wit and humor, but this perpetual mockery, this making a business of holding up all society to ridicule and contempt--no, my dear Norbanus, I cannot like it. More particularly does the way in which he speaks of women displease and vex me. If he is to be believed, there is not in all Rome one faithful wife, or one innocent girl.”
“Pah!” said Norbanus, with his mouth well filled: “There are some of course, but they are scarce, my dear Aurelius, remarkably scarce.”
“What is amusing you so much, Norbanus?” asked Quintus from his place opposite.
“The old theme--women! Aurelius thinks, that our laurel-wreathed poet has sinned basely against the ladies of Rome, by hinting in his epigrams his doubts of their virtue.”
“Who? What?” cried the poet himself, hastily looking round. “What Ravidus is here, to take up the cudgels against my iambics?”
This quotation from Catullus, the favorite poet and model of the epigrammatist, did not fail of its point, for every one, with the single exception of the blushing Aurelius, was reminded by it that Ravidus was, in that passage, called a “crazed and witless wretch.”
“It was I,” said Aurelius coolly. “But it was not your verse that I criticised, but ... however, you heard. If a woman is no more to you than the beetle, the snake that wriggles in the dust, I can but pity your experience.”
“Yours then has been more fortunate?” laughed Martial.
“I should hope so, indeed!”
Lycoris, who, though at some distance, must have heard every word, was chatting vehemently with Stephanus, her neighbor on her left, who kept his gaze alert, though with an air of reserve and dignity. Two of her companions, pretty but by no means maidenly personages, stared contemptuously at Aurelius as if to say: “Well, what a booby!”
“Here is to your health, worthy Cato of the North!” cried Martial mockingly. “Reveal his name to me, O Muse! and I will dedicate to you five and twenty epigrams on his virtue.”
“He has a sharp muzzle,” muttered Norbanus to Aurelius. “You will get the worst of it.”
“No doubt of that,” said Aurelius. “Fencing with words was never my strong ground.”
“Just my case; and I cannot stand his accursed ribaldry. These fellows are like eels, it is impossible to hold them. It is the city tone, my dear friend! Our Stephanus now--only see how the man is made up--now, full in the light. By Castor! he is touched up and painted like a wench--Stephanus again, is a master in the war of words. But he gives you a pebble for a gem; everything about him is false, even his hair. But beware of him; he will try to make mince-meat of you.”
“I say, Martial,” said a harsh voice: “Who is going to publish the epigrams you gave us to-day?”
“I do not yet know. Possibly Tryphon.”
“And when, my friend?”
“Well, in the course of the month.”
“So soon? Listen, when the book comes out, may I send to you to borrow a copy?”
“You are too kind, my dear Lupercus; but why should you give yourself and a slave so much trouble? I live quite high up on the Quirinal. You can get what you want much nearer to you. You pass every day by the Argiletum. There you will find a very interesting shop, exactly opposite the Forum of Caesar. Atrectus, the bookseller, will feel himself honored in selecting a beautiful copy for you--almost given away too, as I may say, for with purple letters and smoothly pumiced it costs but five or six denarii.”
“Six denarii!” exclaimed Lupercus. “That is too dear for me. I have to be saving with my money.”
“And I must be saving with my books.”
“It is not every one, who knows how to be obliging!”
“Nay, do not give up all hope,” retorted the epigrammatist scornfully. “Make your wants known at all the street-corners, and perhaps some costermonger will lend you a copy.”
“Why is Martial so hard upon him?” asked Aurelius of the praetorian guardsman. “This Lupercus seems to be in narrow circumstances.”
“Ha, ha!” laughed Norbanus. “With an income of two hundred thousand sesterces....”
“Impossible! how can a man be at once so rich and so mean?”
“You are in Rome, Aurelius--do not forget that you are in Rome. Here extremes meet; here everything is possible, even the impossible.”
It was now growing dusk, and in a few minutes hundreds of costly bronze lamps were lighted, some hanging in candelabra from the ceiling, some elegantly arranged round the pilasters and columns. Indeed it was not till this moment, that the banquet really assumed the aspect intended by the artistic and extravagant imagination of the hostess. The beaten silver of the massive bowls and platters gleamed brightly under the wreaths of flowers and garlands of foliage, while the huge wine-jars and costly Murrhine vases, the jovial and purpled faces of the guests, the splendid dresses, the pearls and gems--all were doubly effective under the artificial light.
One costly delicacy was followed by another; all the productions of the remotest ends of the earth met at the banquet of Lycoris. Fish from the Atlantic ocean, Muraenae from Lake Lucrinus, Guinea-fowls from Numidia, young kids from the province of Thesprotis in Epirus, pheasants from the Caspian Sea, Egyptian dates, dainty cakes from Picenum, figs from Chios, pistachio nuts from Palestine--were all here of the choicest quality and elaborately prepared. Euphemus, Caesar’s own head-cook, could have done no more. Nor could anything be more perfect, than the grace with which the handsomely-dressed slaves offered each dainty on long slices of bread. After each dish had gone round, little boys with wings brought in magnificent onyx jars filled with perfumed water, which they poured over the hands of the guests. The long flowing hair of a female slave served to dry them, in the place of the more usual linen or asbestos napkin. In such trifles as these Lycoris loved to be original.
During the meal an intermezzo had now and then interrupted the eager conversation. Black-haired girls from Gades and Hispalis had come in, dancing to the cadence of castanets and cymbals; flute-players, singers and reciters had given highly-applauded evidence of their talents. But now, when the business of eating was over and the commissatio, as it was called, the drinking in short, was about to begin, as was hinted by the distribution to the guests of fresh wreaths and of perfumed oils, a buffoon or jester made his appearance, and soon filled the hall with Homeric laughter. His small and muscular form was clothed in gaily-colored scraps of raiment, and his face was painted in strong colors. Entering the room with a hop, skip and jump, he performed a series of somersaults with great skill; then leaping high over the guests’ heads, actually on to the table, he placed himself in front of Lycoris and began thus in a high, shrill voice:
“Highly-esteemed friends of this illustrious house, now that your empty stomachs are duly replenished your minds too are to be no less delightfully satisfied. I offer you the feast of self-knowledge; to each one of you here I will shortly and plainly tell your fortune. If I appear to you over-bold, attribute it to the functions of my office; for audacity is my vocation, as it is that of the most honored Martial.”
A storm of applause rang through the banqueting-hall, and Martial himself even laughed heartily.
“Capital, capital!” he exclaimed to the little man. “Your beginning is admirable and promises much,” and he stroked his grizzled beard with much complacency; the jester bowed and went on with his privileged impertinences. He flung some epigrammatic and pointed remark at one and another of the company, and was each time rewarded by more or less eager applause. When he came round to the young provincial, he grinned with vicious impudence.
“Oh, noble vestal virgin!” he exclaimed, holding his hand before his face in affected coyness. “How much a hundred weight does propriety cost in Trajectum?”
His former jests had been happier and more pointed, but not one had been so readily taken; the company laughed so immoderately, that the buffoon had some difficulty in making himself heard again. Aurelius, though he was disgusted with the fellow, had discretion and tact enough not to draw attention to himself; he laughed and applauded as heartily as any one. Not so, however, Herodianus, his freedman, who reclined at the lower end of the table and had given himself up to silent and unlimited enjoyment of the Caecubum.
“What, you foul-mouthed scoundrel!” he exclaimed in a voice of thunder. “Who are you scoffing at? My dear friend Aurelius compared to a woman! Go home, and let your mother teach you manners.”
The company were in so jovial a mood, that they at once turned this interference into account. When the Batavian was about to reprove Herodianus, he was talked down, while the indignant freedman was spurred on by half-ironical appeals and challenges.
“Let him alone,” said the captain of the guard: “He will serve the jester’s turn well enough.”
“Aye, that he will!” exclaimed another. “Only look at him knitting his brows. Is not he just like the Silenus in Stephanus’ dining-hall?”
“Just be so good as to hold your tongues,” cried Quintus, who had been excessively amused by Herodianus’ pugnacity. “The little man on the table is going to answer him.”
“Silence for the jester!” shouted a chorus.
The buffoon stood still with his hand up to his ear.
“Did I not hear a pug-dog barking?” he said with inimitable comic gravity. “Yes, there he lies, a Maltese pug! Come, Lailaps, come! Here are Lucanian sausages!”
Looking impartially at the freedman’s face, it was impossible to deny that the resemblance was well hit, but Herodianus could hardly be expected to take this unprejudiced view of the matter. Forgetting where and with whom he was, he sprang from his couch, struck his fist on the table, and shouted out, crimson with rage:
“Come on, you braggart, if you dare! I will teach you, I will show you that ... that.... By Hercules! if you do not jump down this minute, you are the most cowardly, contemptible toad under the sun.”
The little man sprang like lightning over Stephanus’ head on to the floor, turned up the sleeves of his particolored shirt and shouted in mockery:
“Come on, Lailaps, come on! I will give you a thrashing.”
For a moment Herodianus seemed to hesitate; then he suddenly flew at the jester like the storm of wind suggested by his Greek dog-name. The jester, however, slipped on one side as quick as lightning, and Herodianus, who, indeed, was not very steady on his feet, fell at full-length on the floor. In an instant the buffoon was sitting astride on his back.
“Pug, you are snappish!” he exclaimed in a triumphant tone, and he began vigorously to belabor every part of the hapless freedman, that he could reach with his powerful fists.
“The dog must be broken!” he exclaimed at each blow. “Quiet, Lailaps, down, my noble cur!”
Herodianus, who, besides, had in falling damaged his knees and elbows, roared like one possessed; in vain did he try to throw off his tormentor. The dwarf clung to him tightly with his legs. The whole scene was as irresistibly comical as though it had been planned for the delectation of a blasé and overwrought party of drinkers. But Aurelius could no longer contain himself; he rose and went up to the combatants with well-assumed coolness.
“You are going too far,” he said. “Be off with you, you little rascal.”
The jester paying no heed to these orders, found himself suddenly picked up by the girdle and with one effort lifted high into the air. His struggles and yells were of no avail; Aurelius carried him like a feather to the table, and there set him down among the cups and wine-jars. The strength and promptness of the proceeding diverted it of any vexatious interference; the dwarf, completely quelled, stood on the table like a stork that has had its wings cut, looking round half-frightened and half-angry. The young Northman’s grip had fairly taken his breath away, and a sign from Lycoris that he might withdraw was evidently welcome to him. He vanished between the crowd of slaves like a startled deer.
Aurelius had hastened to the rescue of Herodianus, who now, having been helped on his feet by some of the servants, found the greatest difficulty in keeping on them.
“Poor fellow!” he said kindly. “But you are really quite incorrigible.”
“Oh, my lord!” groaned Herodianus, “it was only on account of the Vestal virgin! I should not have cared about being called a pug! Oh ye gods! my knees.”
“I will take you in my litter. My own head aches, till it might split.”
“What! are you going?” said Quintus Claudius, coming up to him. “Do you not know that Lycoris has planned a magnificent surprise for her guests?”
“I know it, but I must beg to be excused. These sports are not to my taste. Farewell till we meet again.”
So speaking, he beckoned his Gothic slave, who took the limping freedman round the body and held him up with his usual strength of arm. The pair went first, and Aurelius followed them. All the company had by this time left their places, so his disappearance was almost unremarked; but the fair hostess kept her eye fixed on him, till she lost sight of her ungracious guest in the throng. Then, with an insidious smile, she turned to Quintus, laid her hand on his shoulder, and whispered maliciously: “What sort of foolish philosopher is that who comes here, of all places, to plead the cause of women and take up the cudgels for a freedman?”
“Your foolish philosopher,” replied Quintus, “is one of the noblest souls I ever knew, and beyond a doubt, the very noblest of the men who cross your threshold.”
“Indeed!” said Lycoris, somewhat abashed. “Well, we shall have time by and bye to discuss this paragon of merit!” And with a coquettish toss of her head she turned from Quintus and mingled with the crowd of guests, who were now streaming out into the illuminated gardens.
FOOTNOTES:
TRANSPARENT GAUZE. The island of Cos (Κῶς) belonging to the Sporades, furnished garments made from a half-transparent silk gauze called coa. (See Hor. Sat. I. 2, 101.)
GOLD PLATES. A room has been discovered on the Aventine, whose walls were concealed by gilded bronze plates encrusted with medals; on the Palatine there was an apartment lined with plates of silver, set with precious stones. The halls and chambers in Nero’s domus aurea were covered with golden plates.
STEPHANUS. I have taken considerable liberties in dealing with this personage in his relation to the Empress Domitia. He is, however, historical.
THE OYSTER, (ostrea or ostreum) was considered a great dainty in ancient times. (See note, 42, Vol. 1, “lobster.”)
THERE IS NOT IN ALL ROME ONE FAITHFUL WIFE, OR ONE INNOCENT GIRL. See Martial Ep. IV, 71.
“Long have I search’d, my Soph, the town,
To find a damsel that would frown,
But not a damsel will deny,
As if a shame ’t were to be shy;
As if a sin, will no one dare:
I see not one denying fair.
‘Then of the fair is no one chaste?’
A thousand, Soph, you urge in haste.
‘What does the chaste? Enlarge my views.’
She does not grant, nor yet refuse.”
ELPHINSTON.
In contrast to the hyperbolical expressions of the satirical writers, we are made acquainted in the letters of the younger Pliny, with a number of women of noble character; the historians too, especially Tacitus, as well as inscriptions on the monuments prove--if proof were required--that even in this corrupt age feminine virtue and loftiness of character were not rare. It is natural, that a satirical author should have special keenness of vision for errors and weaknesses.
WHAT RAVIDUS?. The poem to which Martial here alludes is found Cat. Carm. XL.
“Quaenam te mala mens, miselle Ravide
Agit praecipitem in meos iambos?”
TRYPHON, (LUPERCUS). The episode described here, which seems almost like a satirical allusion to the present time, is only one of Martial’s epigrams transposed into action. (Mart. Ep. I, 117.)
“As oft, Sir Tradewell, as we meet,
You’re sure to ask me in the street,
When you shall send your boy to me,
To fetch my book of poetry? etc.”
OLDHAM.
The bookseller Atrectus, who had a shop on the Argiletum, a public square not far from the Forum Caesaris, is also mentioned.--Traces of a well-organized book-trade are found towards the end of the republic. The first publisher on a larger scale is Pomponius Atticus, a friend of Cicero, who formally issued a series of Cicero’s works, for instance the Orator, Quaestiones Academicae, etc., and not only distributed them to the different bookstores in Rome, but supplied the numerous shops in Greece and Asia Minor. (See Cic. ad. Att. XII, 6, XV, 13, XVI, 5.) Yet Atticus was a patron of literature and an aesthetic, rather than a business man. The best-known booksellers and publishers under the emperors were: the Brothers Sosii, who issued the works of Horatius Flaccus (Hor. Ep. I, 20, 2, Ars. poet. 345); Dorus, the Phillip Reclam junior of ancient times, who in the reign of Nero introduced cheap popular editions of Livy and Cicero, (Sen. Benef. VII, 61) and Martial’s publisher, the Tryphon mentioned in this story. (Mart. Ep. IV, 72, XIII, 13.) The editions were provided by slaves, who wrote from dictation. The books were delivered in covers, the backs, glued together, being fastened in the hollow of a cylinder, through which ran a revolving stick. The volumes were cut, the edges were dyed sometimes black and sometimes purple. (See Göll: “Book-trade of the Greeks and Romans,” Schleiz., 1865.) Pollio Valerianus published Martial’s early poems. (Mart. Ep. I, 113, 5.)
QUIRINAL. Martial’s house was near the temple on the Quirinal. (Mart. Ep. X, 58.)
DENARII. At the time of Domitian, the denarius (10 as,) was worth about 15 cents.
STREET-CORNERS. Large square tablets, whitened, for the display of public notices, stood at the corners of the streets. A tablet of this description was called album, (albus-white).
COSTERMONGER. Boiled chick-peas were publicly carried about for sale. (Martial Ep. I, 41, I, 103.)
MASSIVE BOWLS. The crater (crater or cratera) was a large vase or bowl, in which strong wine was mixed with water. A ladle was used to fill the drinking-cups.
MURRHINE VASES, (murrhina vasa). Vases made of murrha, a material with a pale sheen in it, highly valued by the ancients; probably fluor-spar.
GUINEA-FOWLS FROM NUMIDIA, (aves Numidicae or merely Numidicae) were a favorite dish. (Plin., Hist. Nat. Mart. etc.)
THE PROVINCE OF THESPROTIS in Epirus, extended from Chaonia to the Ambracian Gulf. The goats raised there were considered exceptionally good.
PHEASANTS FROM THE CASPIAN SEA. At the time of our story, these birds were a newly-introduced delicacy. Phasis was the name of the boundary river between Asia-Minor and Colchis; hence their name phasianus; (avis Phasiana, or merely Phasiana, or Phasianus--the pheasant.) Martial also calls them volucres Phasides.
DATES. The best quality were imported into Rome from Egypt.
DAINTY CAKES. Bread from Picenum is mentioned in the menu of a banquet given in the latter half of the century B. C., (Marquardt Handbuch, IV, 1.)
FIGS FROM CHIOS. Varro, (R. Rust. I, 41) speaks of Chian,
Lydian, Chalcedonian and African figs.
PISTACHIO NUTS. The best pistachio nuts came from Palestine and Syria, whence Lucius Vitellius introduced them into his garden at Albanum.
EUPHEMUS. Caesar’s head-cook or butler. (See Martial Ep. IV. 8.)
“The tenth hour’s proper for my book and me,
And Euphem, thou who dost the board o’ersee.”
ANON, 1695.
THE LONG FLOWING HAIR OF A FEMALE SLAVE. This fancy was not at all unusual. (See Petron., 27.)
HISPALIS. A city in southern Spain, now Seville.
CASTANETS. Castanet dances are often represented in pictures. (See O. Jahn, Fresco-paintings on the walls of the columbarium, in the Villa Pamfili.)
JESTER. Jesters, especially dwarfs, were very popular in ancient Rome. The scene that follows here is based upon various incidents in a description by Lucian, which has come down to modern times: “The Banquet, or The Lapithae” 18, 19. In this a hideous little fellow, who gives utterance to all sorts of jests and witticisms, appears at Aristaenetus’ banquet. “Finally he addressed each person with some mischievous joke--and each laughed as his turn came. But when he accosted Alcidamas, calling him a Maltese puppy, the latter, especially as he had long been jealous of the applause and attention bestowed on the jester by the whole company, grew angry, threw off his cloak and challenged the dwarf to a boxing-match. What could the poor jester do? It was infinitely comical to see a philosopher fight with a clown. Many of the spectators were ashamed of the scene, but others laughed merrily, until Alcidamas was at last beaten black and blue.”
