Don't lose your head when the machine runs away with you down the hill; simply press the spring.
Don't wait for your rich uncle to die; just send him one of our cycles.
Don't lock your cycle up at night; merely press the spring.
Don't be misled by other firms who say that their machines will also fall to pieces; they are only trying to sell their cycles; we want to sell YOU.
NOTE.--We can also fit this marvellous Little Spring to perambulators, bath-chairs, and bathing machines.
We append below some two out of our million testimonials. The other 999,998 are expected every post.
July, 1906.
Dear Sirs,--I bought one of your cycles in May, 1895, and it is still as good as when I received it. I attribute this solely to the Little Handle-Bar Spring, which I pressed as soon as I received the machine.
P.S.--What do you charge for rebuilding a cycle?
August, 1906.
Gentlemen,--Last month I started to ride to Barnet on one of your cycles. When ascending Muswell Hill, I lost control of the machine, but I simply pressed the spring, and now I feel that I cannot say enough about your bike. I shall never ride any other again.
P.S.--I should very much like to meet the inventor of the "Little Handle-Bar Spring."
Illustration: Friend. "Going about thirty, are we? But don't you run some risk of being pulled up for exceeding the legal pace?"
Owner. "Not in a sober, respectable-looking car like this. Of course, if you go about in a blatant, brass-bound, scarlet-padded, snorting foreign affair, like that, you are bound to be dropped on, no matter how slow you go!"
Illustration: AN AMBUSCADE.--Captain de Smythe insidiously beguiles the fair Laura and her sister to a certain secluded spot where, as he happens to know, his hated rival, Mr. Tomkyns, is in the habit of secretly practising on the bicycle. He (Captain de S.) calculates that a mere glimpse of Mr. T., as he wobbles wildly by on that instrument, will be sufficient to dispel any illusions that the fair Laura may cherish in her bosom respecting that worthy man.
Illustration: Our own Undergraduate (fresh from his Euclid). "Ha! Two riders to one prop."
Illustration: INSULT ADDED TO INJURY.--Wretched Boy. "Hi, guv'nor! D'yer want any help?"
